Out of the mouths of the child and her dad!

The last few days have been incredibly intense with some quite funny moments playing out in our house. The following are fast becoming the source of many smiles.

The first happened when we had minx sitting on the toilet early one morning. The hubby (who wasn't wearing anything due to he grabbed the potty seat and I grabbed the kid) had leaned around the door to talk to me and hand me my robe.

Our sweet little 2 year old girl pointed at his bits and said "Daddy tail, daddy tail, daddy tail." I didn't get what she said to begin with until he told me what she was pointing at. Needless to say the hubby now says he wants to put some clothes on before he comes and helps with her. ;)

Another funny bit came last night after the hubby and I put the minx in bed. We were sitting on the couch talking about the said minx and how the potty training was going. The hubby all the sudden said "I'm a bit jealous, I wish I could pee in the living room when I wanted to."

Then today minx asked for some cheddars (little cheesy crackers) I said we didn't have any. She looked at me all put out and said "Oh for gods sake!" You'd think the world was endingd from not having any cheddars. ;)

Charity underhandedness!

You know every year I get loads of charity mail through the door. I am very good about it I try and pick a few and buy something from them. Or I at least try and send some sort of donation or drop a coin into the donation bucket every few weeks.

What happened this morning would have the hair on my back standing on end if I had any hair on my back. I do feel slightly growly as well (though that could be partially lack of coffee;) ), think they might have set off the inner wildcat.

Nice fat little packet arrives in the mail from certain charity (I'll be nice and not name them since they do good work even if they have pissed me off!)

I open it up, there is a set of 8 Christmas cards and a holiday calender in the envelope. I thought to myself and told the husband that was a bit odd. Considering this charity specifically sales cards and the calender every year why would they be sending free ones. As it is, my mother-in-law buys cards from them every year so I do know more about them.

I fish around in the cards and up pops an order form, it says "To buy the cards enclosed please send £5.95 to such and such address." It also lists other things you can buy.

WTF?????????????????? You send me cards in the mail and want me to pay for them even though I never ordered them? Well that is way beyond underhanded in my book. Then I read that it says you are under no obligation to buy the cards or return the cards. Yeah fucking right no obligation!

Bloody Hell, if was one card, or a pen or even those address labels you sometimes get then I wouldn't feel the need to have to pay for them. Any sensitive person would probably feel like they were obligated to pay for them. (Yes I know I am a loud mouth, opinionated, brash and basically naughty person, but I still am very sensitive and caring.) Its not like there wasn't a great effort made to make the cards. The paintings on the cards are usually done by people with no arms. They paint with their feet.

The hubby has said no we are not paying for them. That it was an underhanded way to try and get people to support them. Like I said if it was one card you think cool, thats nifty, might order some of those. A full pack of 8 cards and you feel like the Wicked Witch of the East not buying them. Yet I really don't want to have to pay for postage to send the cards back, but feel guilty for the thought of keeping them for free and using them.

AAARRRRGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, maybe I can package them up in a plastic card sleeve and take them to be sold at the charity shop. Or sale them at the mother-in-laws shop and put the money in a charity bucket.

I feel we are right though, it was the wrong way for them to go about this. Even though they will probably get plenty of orders for having done it that way. So I will suck in the guilt. I will not send the cards back or pay for them. I think I'll stick to the idea of taking them to the mother-in-laws shop and having the money go on to charity.

To jump fully into the british way of saying things, bastards complete bastards for making me start my morning off like this.

I'm locked in!

Anyone who knows the joys of keeping children out of the places they should not be will know at times its a test of wills.

The other night our little girl got through a gate we thought was closed and fell down the stairs. Needless to say it scared a good ten years off our lives in that one moment. Thankfully children roll and bounce really well. She came away with a couple of bruises and a few days of "less activity." Mind you that has been another contest of wills.

So today when I needed to get dressed I took her up, made sure all the gates were closed, and flipped the lock on the outside of her dad's office door. Now he was inside and I did tell him I was doing it. We do that sometimes to keep her from having a rumage while hes working. Normally he does it from the inside.

Today he was bit sick and I thought I'd save him for a few minutes, lock the door...get dressed...unlock door and go back downstairs.

Did it happen that way? No it did not. I got busy playing with the said munchkin, loaded her up and took off down the stairs laughing and playing.

We had been off playing for a awhile when I walked through the dinning room and happened to notice parts of some red letters on my computer in a small window. I thought to myself "what in the world is that."

Walking over I see this in a talker window:

 .  _ _                  _            _            _
+> [] . (_| )_ __ ___   | | ___   ___| | _____  __| |
+> [] . | |/| '_ ` _ \  | |/ _ \ / __| |/ / _ \/ _` |
+> [] . | | | | | | | | | | (_) | (__|   <  __/ (_| |
+> [] . |_| |_| |_| |_| |_|\___/ \___|_|\_\___|\__,_|
+> [] .
+> [] .  _
+> [] . (_)_ __
+> [] . | | '_ +> [] . | | | | |
+> [] . |_|_| |_|

I also see my IM window flashing and it has a very polite "lemme out please =)."

What do I do, I nearly collapse in the floor laughing. I laugh all the way upstairs. And yes I even thought of making him sweat it out a few more minutes in pure evilness, but I did manange to control that part of my nature and decided to let him out. ;)

I unlock the door and hes standing there looking all stern and I nearly fell on the floor laughing again. I did manage to get I'm so sorry out between the laughing bursts and even gave him a kiss.

I'm just glad I had decided on not going for the walk that I had planned this morning. I can just imagine how upset he would have been locked in his office till lunch. ;)

My great evil sense of humour does want to test it one more time, but I think one accidental lock in might be let go, a second might be construed as an act of war.;)